How Insensitive
I used to share a very special relationship with one particular girl in my life... We had our fair share of ups and downs... Throughout the years however, we seem to have drifted apart... And it's been a long time since we've been on talking terms...
Why? you ask... Well, I can't remember when we 1st had our arguments... but I think it was built up over time... Her harsh words and mine sometimes... I think we hurt one another emotionally... and it's only by God's grace we didn't resort to violence... The pain, anguish, [inserts long chain of adjectives here] I think resulted in a silent war...
At that time, she was drifting further away from God... I'm not gonna reveal her personal life here... Well, cut a long story short... She's come back to Christ recently... so I've heard... I rejoice for her... and we've started to talk again... because I want to bury the hatchet and because I want to try my best to love her... though I might not like the things she does most of the time... but because of Jesus' love for me, I can find the strength to love her... as hard as it is for me to do so sometimes...
I recently unblocked her from msn... yes, yes... you may think this is childish... and it probably is... but the reason I blocked her and shut her out of my life is because I feared getting hurt emotionally... you may think it cliche... but sometimes the dust of familiarity can blind one's eyes...
Well, talking with her on msn still brings back bad memories... and I'm not one to forget easily... it was interesting.... every time I said something... it felt as if she was scrutinising everything I did in my life... saying things "out of love" seemed like a flippant excuse for attacking me and putting me down... and with our kinda history... you'd know why... everything she said seemed condescending but I'll give her the benefit of the doubt that she cares for me and wants the best for me... Though I'd appreciate it if she toned it down a bit when it gets more than annoying...
We could quote lots of scripture about the fine line between looking at the plank in one's eye and looking out for your fellow believer... but I'm not going to do that... Mainly because this is in no way an attack on her for whatever wrong she's done in my life or my mistakes in hers... Instead, I'll be the 1st to say I'm sorry and ask for her forgiveness... and I too forgive her for all the pain and hurt she's caused in mine... Dumbing yourself down isn't easy... Those of you who know me well know I like to keep everything inside of me... bottled up for years on end... emotions in every living fibre of my body expressed through music... what an outlet...
No, my friends, this is not a testimony of how much I dislike that girl or the things she has done... It is instead my public declaration of trying to love her as much as Jesus loves me... And though I still find it really really really really really really really tough, I'm trying my very best... for our real enemy is the evil one who is trying to tear us apart... not each other and I will not let him succeed... and though I may still not like her actions.... I'm loving her more each day.... for God's love conquers all...
Still trying...
Why? you ask... Well, I can't remember when we 1st had our arguments... but I think it was built up over time... Her harsh words and mine sometimes... I think we hurt one another emotionally... and it's only by God's grace we didn't resort to violence... The pain, anguish, [inserts long chain of adjectives here] I think resulted in a silent war...
At that time, she was drifting further away from God... I'm not gonna reveal her personal life here... Well, cut a long story short... She's come back to Christ recently... so I've heard... I rejoice for her... and we've started to talk again... because I want to bury the hatchet and because I want to try my best to love her... though I might not like the things she does most of the time... but because of Jesus' love for me, I can find the strength to love her... as hard as it is for me to do so sometimes...
I recently unblocked her from msn... yes, yes... you may think this is childish... and it probably is... but the reason I blocked her and shut her out of my life is because I feared getting hurt emotionally... you may think it cliche... but sometimes the dust of familiarity can blind one's eyes...
Well, talking with her on msn still brings back bad memories... and I'm not one to forget easily... it was interesting.... every time I said something... it felt as if she was scrutinising everything I did in my life... saying things "out of love" seemed like a flippant excuse for attacking me and putting me down... and with our kinda history... you'd know why... everything she said seemed condescending but I'll give her the benefit of the doubt that she cares for me and wants the best for me... Though I'd appreciate it if she toned it down a bit when it gets more than annoying...
We could quote lots of scripture about the fine line between looking at the plank in one's eye and looking out for your fellow believer... but I'm not going to do that... Mainly because this is in no way an attack on her for whatever wrong she's done in my life or my mistakes in hers... Instead, I'll be the 1st to say I'm sorry and ask for her forgiveness... and I too forgive her for all the pain and hurt she's caused in mine... Dumbing yourself down isn't easy... Those of you who know me well know I like to keep everything inside of me... bottled up for years on end... emotions in every living fibre of my body expressed through music... what an outlet...
No, my friends, this is not a testimony of how much I dislike that girl or the things she has done... It is instead my public declaration of trying to love her as much as Jesus loves me... And though I still find it really really really really really really really tough, I'm trying my very best... for our real enemy is the evil one who is trying to tear us apart... not each other and I will not let him succeed... and though I may still not like her actions.... I'm loving her more each day.... for God's love conquers all...
Still trying...
posted by Jordan at 10:24 am
9 Comments:
Hey Jordan - was looking for reviews on online love powerful spells but found your site by accident. Don't know why you come up looking for online love powerful spells but whatever. I read a few of your posts and thought they were cool, so I just wanted to say thanks!!!!
Hello Jordan, this is an exciting blog here!
You may like to checkout long distance relationship site/blog.
101 Ways to Build Happy, Lasting Relationships at long distance relationship - RelationshipAdviceGuide.com stuff.
Lighten Up :Often when couples have gone through or are going through some bumpy spots in their relationship, things tend to get serious.
Hello Jordan, this is an exciting blog here!
You may like to checkout people relationship dating site/blog.
101 Ways to Build Happy, Lasting Relationships at people relationship dating - RelationshipAdviceGuide.com stuff.
Lighten Up :Often when couples have gone through or are going through some bumpy spots in their relationship, things tend to get serious.
Excellent Jordan!!!
You may want to check out relationship tip
101 Ways to Build Happy, Lasting Relationships at relationship tip - RelationshipAdviceGuide.com site.
Make Eye Contact :Think back to the first time you saw your now mate.
Hello Jordan, this is an exciting blog here!
You may like to checkout relationship quote site/blog.
101 Ways to Build Happy, Lasting Relationships at relationship quote - RelationshipAdviceGuide.com stuff.
Lighten Up :Often when couples have gone through or are going through some bumpy spots in their relationship, things tend to get serious.
Hey "Jordan", just found your site on a search for love spells. Read a few posts, so thought I'd say hi and thanks! :)
Me. -- "I tried these love spells and chants and got my boyfriend back!"
Hello Jordan, this is an exciting blog here!
You may like to checkout love site/blog.
101 Ways to Build Happy, Lasting Relationships at love - RelationshipAdviceGuide.com stuff.
Multilingual : English | Chinese Simplified | Chinese Traditional | Dutch | French | German | Greek | Italian | Japanese | Korean | Portuguese | Russian | Spanish
Adore your Mate : Appreciate and love them for the person they are.
Hello Jordan, this is an exciting blog here!
You may like to checkout love relationship site/blog.
101 Ways to Build Happy, Lasting Relationships at love relationship - RelationshipAdviceGuide.com stuff.
Multilingual : English | Chinese Simplified | Chinese Traditional | Dutch | French | German | Greek | Italian | Japanese | Korean | Portuguese | Russian | Spanish
Adore your Mate : Appreciate and love them for the person they are.
Hey "Jordan", just found your site on a search for love spells. Read a few posts, so thought I'd say hi and thanks! :)
Me. -- "I tried these love spells online and got my boyfriend back!"
Post a Comment
<< Home